This evening while I was simultaneously making dinner and entertaining a toddler and texting back and forth with my BFF about a Foucauldian critique of Mary Poppins, a segment came on NPR about the increased involvement of women in fantasy football. I obviously didn't catch the whole thing in detail, but from what I heard, there appeared to be two major claims. The first one was that women are more likely to be involved in fantasy football than previously because there are more tech options available. Like shiny pink electronic devices that allow them to track and control their fantasy teams on the go. Because everyone in the tech world knows that women will only be interested in techy objects that add convenience to their lives if they come in pepto-bismol pink. Right? OK, I actually added the part about the pink shiny objects. But still.
The second major theme I caught was that women don't approach fantasy football the way men do. Because men are all about winning when they play fantasy football, while women aren't. Women are just all about the pretty man-flesh. To illustrate this point they featured a couple of Sample Females™ faux-whisper-gushing about how hawt some player was, and then admitting in a confessorial tone that they generally don't choose their players based on the quality of their performance on the field. Or something like that. So here we have The Truth About Women and Men and Fantasy Football. All women. And all men. 'Cause all men are hetero and competitive and base all their choices on strategic reasoning alone. And women never behave this way and always behave in a frivolous, flighty manner. And they whisper and giggle while doing it. On their pretty pink mobile devices.
Look, I'll agree that Brady Quinn is one of the finest examples of Man Candy out there. Mm-hmm. That boy is delicious. But there's no way he'd be my quarterback of choice if I actually had time to play fantasy football this year. And I'd bet the price of two Superbowl tickets that there are many other women out there playing fantasy football who aren't choosing their players based on how pretty they are either. But who wants to hear about women making smart, well-thought-out choices? Especially when it comes to such a manlyman sport? No, it's only newsworthy when they giggle and drool and type daintily on their pink mobile devices.