Thursday, February 11, 2010
Video of the Day
In response to this pathetic Superbowl ad.
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I will get up and pack your lunch at 6:30 a.m.
I will eat half a grapefruit for breakfast.
I will get the kids ready for school.
I will ignore your smelly loser friend who is crashing on our couch.
I will make $.75 for every dollar you make doing the same job.
I will assert myself and get called a bitch.
I will catch you staring at my breasts but pretend not to notice.
I will put my career on hold to raise your children.
I will diet, Botox, and wax... everything.
I will assure you that size doesn’t matter.
I will be a lady in the street but a freak in bed.
I will turn a blind eye to your ever encroaching baldness.
I will humor your fantasy baseball obsession.
I will pretend not to notice when you cry at the end of Rudy.
I will watch TV shows where fat, stupid, unattractive men have beautiful wives.
I will allow you to cheat on me with other women.
I will see Paul Blart: Mall Cop. Twice.
I will elect male politicians who will make decisions about my body.
I will listen to Rush and tell you, yes, if there were a gold medal for air-drumming, you would win it.
I will get angry, and you will ask if it’s that time of the month.
I will watch Superbowl commercials that depict men as emasculated and depressed, and I will feel so fucking sorry for you.