What to do when you've survived a long exhausting day, come home to three sick and high-maintenance family members, juggled the dinner-bath-bed routine, done some minor cleanup and laundry duties and then find you can't sleep in spite of your exhaustion? Simple. Pour yourself a rum and root beer (in the absence of whiskey) and park yourself in front of the computer to peruse vintage sexist ads. It's a restorative to treat any feminine ailment.
The best of the best:
Watch Clara: she's always trying to stash her meds in her "secret place." If there's anything we don't need up in here, it's women hiding meds in their "secret places."
When Gerald lost the will to stare at titties, his doctor prescribed Dexamyl, which helped him realize that his real problem was that his wife was just too plain and dowdy, in spite of her jaunty hats and matching accessories.
Yet another ad regarding the symptoms of "the menopause" which seems to have been written as a class project in ESL 101.
And finally, a semi-serious one. I've gotten terrible coughs all my life, and at times codeine is the only thing that helps. Sadly, I was born too late to ever have codeine with cannabis extract prescribed for my coughs. The injustice of the universe in this regard is staggering.